


I am Not alone

by ShiningFantasyStar



Series: Sanghyuk's birthday drabble extravaganza [6]
Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Drabble, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fantasy, Hurt/Comfort, Jaeyoon is a lizard boy, M/M, Mentions of Blood, Mild Angst, Repentance, Vampire dawon, a little dark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-31
Updated: 2019-07-31
Packaged: 2020-07-27 22:06:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20053273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShiningFantasyStar/pseuds/ShiningFantasyStar
Summary: Sanghyuk is cursed and banished; Jaeyoon is the only one willing to help.





	I am Not alone

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a little different from the other prompts,,, I feel like its a bit dark.. perhaps too dark? I really wanted to try writing something fantasy/ occult like. Apologies if it's not the best :<
> 
> Title and quote sections inspired by Sori x folded dragons I am Not alone~ Definitely give it a listen~
> 
> TW // mild mentions of blood, past abuse (not in detail at all)

Sanghyuk lays on the solid ground, hair matted with the now dried blood, his skin sizzling under the scorching sun like eggs on a pan. His mind spins with images. Some flash faces he used to recognise, others are simple materialisations of his desires or simple hallucinations. He pities himself, and in some ironic way, realises that he is banished to this desert is for that exact reason. Self pity, selfishness, greed. His major flaws. Yet, he still lays there, dying, pitying himself.

_ It’s not too late_

_Don’t lose yourself_

A voice resounds through his body, seemingly vibrating through his the cracks in the earth, no, through the heat of the air. It’s a voice Sanghyuk has never heard before. Strangely soft and gentle, compared to the pain and harshness of this situation. He’s dying he figures, his mind grasping at the impossible scenario of a rescue. Sanghyuk whimpers, or at least makes a strange, barely audible noise trying, with his throat dry as bones. Millennia of his crude and cold heart finally catching up to him. And he cries, or tries to, with the heat burning his cheeks or perhaps the void in his unbeating heart, no tears spill past his lashes. He is so caught up in his self pity, that he doesn’t hear skittering across the hardened sandstone. The voice rings around him again, more stable than before, real. 

“H- he-rrpph” Sanghyuk spits the sand from his mouth, choking on the dryness of his throat. He feels a cold touch on his cheek._ He feels._ There are hands on his waist and under his knees, and he is plunged into darkness.

_I’m not alone_

_I just lost myself for a moment_

Sanghyuk stirs awake, immediately wincing from the pain shooting up his body. His skin feels wet, sloppy even, yet its dry enough that it cracks with the slightest movement. Still, Sanghyuk isn’t dead, which he is grateful for. His throat is still dry, it burns even, in a way he knows wouldn’t be quenched by water. _He needs blood._ His body is physically exhausted from regenerating while in the open sun without any drink.

The darkness above him is pure, starless, moonless. And judging by the temperature, it’s not night time at all. Somehow Sanghyuk found himself in some cave, or house of some sorts. It’s a welcomed break from the desert heat, his mind still spinning and hazy, he drifts into darkness again. Unaware of the golden eyes watching him carefully.

He wanders a maze, endlessly searching for something. There is desperation in his movements: as if his being knows whatever he needs is close, but could disappear any minute. Its cold, very cold, the feeling of loneliness leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. 

Sanghyuk starts awake when a warm, yet lifeless chunk drops on his chest. Some sort of small critter. Its neck is snapped, but the heart still thrashes, attempting to pump the carcass with life. The smell of adrenaline is strong from the critter, its blood smelling so, so sweet, calling Sanghyuks name. His eyes flash a deep crimson red, and Sanghyuk snaps up, fangs extending and tearing into its belly. He greedily laps up the blood, feeling more and more alive with each drop. Its ugly, its desperate, but Sanghyuk knows that's what he’s always been.

His skin regenerates to the point where it doesn't hurt to move anymore, and his senses heightened. Though he is still exhausted and weak, defenceless against the outside. He is aware of the pair of eyes hiding in the shadows, and slowly turns to face the owner, be it friend or foe.

“Hi,” a pair of bright golden eyes speak. The person? No creature, reaches out from the darkness another critter in its hand. The dying pulse is tempting, a silent bartering with Sanghyuk. The arm is a pale green, covered in scales.

“Hi?” He replies, his throat no longer parched. 

“Take it, it’s for you.” The creature bids.

Sanghyuk weakly reaches out, grabbing the green hand and tugging it out of the shadow. He’s unsure where the surge of strength came from but the creature stumbles, surprised. It falls into a brighter part of the room.

Sanghyuk admires the creature before him. His body is shaped much like one of a human; the main differences are the pale green scales, which travel up his arms, reaching all the way to his neck. There are two small slits in his neck, which expand and contract with the creatures breaths. The scales fade into skin at his jawline, and Sanghyuk almost does a double take when he looks at his face. His lips, nose and those luminous gold eyes, seem to be placed masterfully by the gods themselves. 

“N-no. Don’t l- look at me,” the creature pleads while covering his face from view.

Sanghyuk tilts his head confused, he isn’t sure what the lizard boy is, but he’s handsome. “You saved my life, didn’t you?”

Shyly the boy peeks between his clawed fingers, nodding softly. His black hair appears bouncy and soft.

“Then why can’t I look at you?”

“Yo- you mean… You mean you don’t find me hideous? L- like everyone else…?”

Sanghyuk almost laughs, “you just saw me suck that creature dry, like the monster I am, and you think you are hideous? You are gorgeous, a literal angel that saved a cursed vampire.”

His body stings at the mention of the curse,_ what did the lines go like again? Perish on the verge of death, in the desert until… until what?_ Sanghyuk pictures the old mage, his angered expression. Yet he cannot recall the key to break his curse, too cocky to listen to the elders threats.

The lizard boy smiles at that, a light pink dusting his tan face. Cute little dimples plop on his face, and Sanghyuk almost wants to touch them. Almost. But he doesn’t. “Jaeyoon. T-that’s my name. Do- do you have one?”

“Sanghyuk” he replies coolly, admiring the others dimples. Jaeyoon’s eyes light up and his mouth makes a big ‘o’ shape, and somehow he looks more like a newly hatched chick than a lizard.

Sanghyuks stomach growls and instinctively his fangs extend. His eyes burn crimson again, and he glances at the stiffening creature on the floor. “Do you mind?” he bites back a hiss in an attempt to control his body.

Jaeyoon shakes his head and Sangyuk pounces, drinking up the blood like a dog laps water, tongue swiveling in circles. Jaeyoon doesn’t flinch, or react much to his surprise. It’s as if Sanghyuk was enjoying a smoothie, or something normal. 

His eyelids droop, and his body wants to shut down again. He feels drugged, but knows this is his body attempting to catch up on exhaustion.

_The reason I cried like a fool_

_Was because I was tired for a minute_

He dreams of the maze again. Whatever he is chasing now has a more physical form. It actually feels attainable, but still falls just outside of reach. Still, he chases it, lost in the corridors of his mind. He hears a gentle crying, and follows it. The nearer he gets to it, the more severe the crying; it soon becomes full wails of despair-

He wakes up, tears streaming down his cheeks. He figures his body healed enough to produce fluids again. To his side is Jaeyoon curled up cutely, claws carefully wrapped around his arm, hugging it to his chest. Sanghyuks movement alarms him, and he peeks up, at Sanghyuk.

“You were having nightmares,” Jaeyoon whispers softly, his voice mildly familiar against the darkness, “thought y- you’d need this.”

“Thank you,” Sanghyuk says, and for the first time in millennia, he thinks he’s actually grateful to someone. Somewhere in the back of his mind he hears a crack, like glass groaning under pressure, not quite shattering.

Jaeyoon shuffles to give Sanghyuk space, but he stops him, placing a hand on his arms. They’re much tougher than he’d expected, strong muscles hidden under his natural armour like skin. “Stay. Please?”

Jaeyoon smiles, shuffling closer again, and Sanghyuk is convinced he is an angel.

When Sanghyuk regains his strength and doesn’t pass out every five minutes, he explains to Jaeyoon how he had found himself in this desert. And Jaeyoon explains how he had been abandoned by his mother, who screamed that she had birthed a monster. He had fled to the desert and began a new life out here, where nobody could judge him.

Sanghyuk isn’t sure if it’s the fact that Jaeyoon’s life was heartbreaking, or the fact that Jaeyoon doesn’t fear him. But something about Jaeyoon is warm and accepting, and for the first time Sanghyuk allows himself to be clingy, like a child.

He hunts for himself now, during the night. The small critters blood doesn’t taste as sweet anymore, as he isn’t as desperate for survival. He catches and eats his prey away from Jaeyoon- he knows the lizard boy doesn’t mind it, but Sanghyuk feels sinful, dirty.

Nightmares still plague his mind, the same maze repeating itself in his mind. Each time he wakes, he is nestled against Jaeyoon. And his heart melts, feeling safe.

_Don’t cry anymore_

_Chances always come back_

Jaeyoon falls ill, and Sanghyuk slowly loses his mind. Every morning he runs to the nearby oasis (which Jaeyoon showed him one night) and fetches fresh water for him. His skin burns and bubbles under the morning light, but Sanghyuk doesn’t care.

Jaeyoon shivers under the wet cloth, and Sanghyuk lifts him to help him drink some water. 

“D- don’t worry too much,” Jaeyoon stutters, a nervous speaking habit trained into him with years of pain, that he couldn’t get rid of, “this is normal. This happens sometimes, I’ll be okay.”

Sanghyuk believe that, of course, but he is still worried. Scared.

A crack rings through the back of his mind, a crystal clear sound and a blinding light floods his eyes. 

_Perish on the verge of death, in the desert until your stone cold heart learns compassion._

Sanghyuk gasps, opening his eyes expecting to see the source of the bright light and voice. Instead he sees Jaeyoon, no longer burning up, or weak.

He heaves himself into a sitting position, gold eyes staring with confusion. “Um, what just happened?”

“I think… I’m free?” Sanghyuk starts, “and somehow, so are you?”

Jaeyoon smiles, “I guess even monsters like us deserve a second chance.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading & again apologies if it wasn't the best or was too dark to be a part of this drabble collections.
> 
> drabble? what drabble? this word count got a bit long >.<


End file.
